(Note: I’m terrible at blog titles. This one is a prime example. Early apologies.)
Today, my hope for the future of humanity was extinguished.
Hyperbole, you say? No, say I. Truth. Fact.
We are doomed.
There a few simple things in life that I find a crazy amount of pleasure in: brand new socks, all types of ice cream, Lost, and…
If you’re not familiar with the candy, what are you doing with your life??
Is it the best candy ever? No.
Top 5? No.
Top 15? Not ever.
However, there’s no better way to deliver a jolt of artificial banana flavor to your system like a fun-sized, individually wrapped Laffy Taffy. And when Laffy Taffy says “fun-sized” they mean it! Laffy is more than just half their name, it’s a way of life. They put two jokes on the outside of their wrapper, because they believe you deserve more than just an incredibly hard candy. You deserve to laugh….er, laff.
Candy and jokes?! Are kidding me?! What a great combo!
Are these jokes the greatest? No. No stand-up comic is going to be ripping off Laffy Taffy. These are cheesy jokes, sent in by children, students, and little ones across the country.
Here’s my favorite:
Q: What do you do with a sick bee?
A: Take him to the ‘Wasp-ital!’
Classic, right? These little chuckles get me through the day.
This little “gem” (if we can call it that) was discover today:
Wow, Chad D. of New Bedford. Wow. That’s…terrible. Your parents let you send that in? I bet your room is filled with participation trophies too…
This is what kids find funny?! This is humor to this next generation?! “MAYBE”?! Children are our future! I heard a celebrity ensemble sing it, so it must be!
Does the fault lie with Chad D’s parents? Society? A poor public school system? Canada? I don’t know, but if this is a sign of things to come, Nuclear/Zombie/Cylon Apocalypse is not far behind.
I had to eat THREE more pieces just to make up for this.
We are doomed.